Evening Attire

Last evening I walked the red carpet with Mr. Mickey by my side. The cameras were flashing, and there was an adoring crowd. 

OK, it wasn't THAT red carpet, but it was fun!

We attended the 'Spirits of the Season' gala for the American Cancer Society, after which we attended the November performance of the Johnson City Symphony Orchestra. The evening's events allowed me to view all ages and sizes of ladies in their evening finery. 

Try to remember that if it isn't appropriate for your age and body shape or size during the day, it doesn't magically become so after dark. I saw dresses that were too small, too short, too plunging, and too shiny for the women who chose to wear them. Some ladies seemed to be wearing every single piece of bling they owned, and if that wasn't enough, they also wore glittery eye shadow. Oh my!

Many of my friends who attend these functions regularly were also at both events.  I noticed that there was a common thread uniting all of us. We were dressed in attire that was devoid of excess glitter, extra bling, or plunging necklines. There wasn't a bare back or arm among us. I dare say none of us rushed down to the local Pageant Boutique to buy a special dress for this event. We looked attractive, comfortable, and appropriate for any evening event. 

Dressing well includes being comfortable. If you look silly in your skin tight satin dress without the benefit of proper foundation garments at home, you will not look better when you get to the event. 

I strongly believe that you should combine the clothes you already own to make them work for any occasion. You have seen some elements of my recent looks before, which proves I make investments in clothes and shoes that can be worn many times in different combinations to earn their worth. 

Your attire at any event should reflect a confident, well-dressed woman who is comfortable in her own skin. I would prefer to look as if I've been here many times and it's no big deal instead of "I'm wearing my daughter's slinky prom dress with four-inch heels I can't walk in."

You may also be attending parties and special black tie events this season so remember these tips when you do. Be comfortable. Maintain your dignity. Be true to yourself. Look special and elegant. Have fun!

Friday Date Night

Friday is always date night for us. We get dressed up and visit our favorite gourmet restaurant. Even if we just share an appetizer and have a glass of wine, it is a ritual that we both enjoy very much. It is our time to relax and share the events of the week, our hopes and dreams. One must always have dreams!

This week I wore a jacket I bought earlier this year from the half-off sale rack of a swanky boutique in Asheville. It is now too big for me, but I layer it with a tank to make it work. Here I'm wearing it with wider leg black crepe trousers and a black tank with a draping neckline, which is a bit dressier than a form-fitting one.

Shoes and Earrings Relate

When you are getting dressed, do you ever think ... these earrings go great with these shoes?

It's true! Shoes and earrings are related. All the components of your outfit make a small statement that adds to the total look and tells your story for the day. 

Jewelry tells a story for me because I was a designer for so many years. I went on market trips to NY and Atlanta with boutique owners so that I could start creating appropriate jewelry for the lines they were buying long before they arrived in the stores.  Accessories that are not so much matching but complementing in color and attitude complete a look.

Think about the attitude of the pieces you are putting together. For example, the navy strappy sandals say evening wear, as do the navy drop earrings. The T-Strap suede shoe says fashion-forward and a little daring... so do the suede hoop earrings. 

Accessories from head to toe should speak the same language.

Animal Print Vest

The weather was unseasonably warm for late October so my outfit for date night included lightweight layers and black sandals. 

The long sleeve black tee is from Chico's. The pants were by Anne Klein in a wonderfully smooth heavy knit fabric from my fabulous haul at Ross yesterday. The animal print flowing sheer fabric long vest is from Coldwater Creek. I love these vests as a third element. They can be worn as a scarf, a wrap, or a vest and serve as a year-round accessory. I've found them at Chico's and Coldwater Creek in several color combinations.
 

The necklace is by Erica Lyons from Belk. The black sandals are from Stein Mart, and the pewter clutch is by Kenneth Cole Reaction via T.J. Maxx.

Thanks for reading! I hope the rest of your week is fabulous.

The Formula

Do you have a formula for the way you dress? 

Long ago, I realized that if I wore smooth flowing fabrics in a soft palette of colors, I would be able to layer items or combine them in different ways to create outfits for many occasions. 

My closet includes basic pieces that can be worn with different accessories to elevate them from daytime work wear to elegant evenings with friends. I won't buy a wardrobe of clothes which serve only one purpose (such as evening wear). A silk blouse I might wear with jeans to run errands during the day can also be worn with a black pencil skirt or crepe pants for dinner with friends. Accessories are the key that makes these combinations work for me.

Large scarves, wraps, or shawls are a great way to add dramatic color and 'temperature control' as is often needed at this stage of life. Sunglasses are a daytime staple for me. I never leave without them. Earrings with a button top and dangles or hoops are much more flattering than those little wires that pass through the hole in your ear. A large link bracelet or a stack of bangles (or both!) are great accessories to add to almost any outfit. If I wear a statement necklace, I balance the drama by wearing minimal other accessories. 

Structured handbags and clutches are much more flattering than big shoulder bags that make you look lopsided and sloppy. 

Interesting but comfortable shoes are a must! Life is way too short to wear boring shoes. 

This is my formula for shopping and getting dressed every day. These tips serve me well and have helped me get ready for any event for most of my adult life. 

If you have high contrast coloring, such as dark brown eyes with an olive skin-tone and dark silver-gray hair, and a bold, outgoing personality, your formula might be very different from mine.

I hope that sharing my ideas for dressing will help you put together easy, fabulous outfits so that you can get busy enjoying life.

Breaking Rules

You may have heard the saying, "You must know the rules to break them effectively." With my soft contrast cool coloring, I should not wear brown or warm animal prints... but I love both!

Last night for date night, I wore an animal print tunic from Chico's Travelers Collection. I layered it over a sleek, long sleeve tee with spandex and Lycra, also from Chico's last year. The slim black pants were from Stein-Mart last year. The high heeled booties are by Vince Camuto, and they are from Nordstrom. Despite their high heels, these booties are comfortable and easy to walk in.

The little evening purse is one of my favorites, but it might be fifteen years old. The silver and clear rhinestone hoops add a touch of cool tones next to my face.

The tunic is a little too large, but I would prefer anything that buttons, not fit too tight across my bust. I often go up a size in tops for that reason. I will also be able to wear this lightweight tunic over summer clothes with the sleeves turned up.

The key to this outfit is balance. I would never wear these slim leg pants with anything but a long tunic, and I would never wear this tunic with anything but slim leg pants or a pencil skirt. Never wear two pieces that visually add width together. Always balance flowing boxy pieces over slim-fitting pieces or vice versa. (An opposite example would be a slim tank top over a flowing maxi skirt.)

Wearing Tights

I love the look of chunky booties with tights and a pencil skirt for daytime in the cooler months. When the proportions are right for you and the skirt isn't too short, you can still turn heads in a good way.

 

Proper fit is always important but especially so in a skirt. If the skirt is too tight or short, you will not be comfortable or appropriate. Wearing a skirt with tights during the day in the cooler months is a great fresh look. Tights are opaque legwear that allows us to get away with so much more than sheer stockings would. I normally wear sheer black stockings for the evening only. Wolford makes the top of the line tights, which are well worth the investment. (They create lots of other fabulous items we need too!)

Here I've paired a graphite skirt with a loose-fitting graphite long sleeve tee and a scarf. The scarf brings in the other colors to add. Burgundy is the color for us! It's very flattering to the face and can be worn with all neutrals.

Beauty Routines After 50

Many have written to ask for tips on makeup and hairstyles that respect our changing faces. I am sharing my step by step routine with you here.

Permanent makeup, fillers, and plastic surgery are not options I am considering. I don't mind the character and expression lines that my face has developed over the years. I firmly believe that healthy eating, lots of water, and regular exercise are the best beauty routines one can follow.

After fifty, some things became easier, and for me, a hairstyle definitely falls into that category. After my fiftieth birthday, I stopped coloring my hair and found a great stylist who gives me a softly layered angled bob cut that frames and slims my roundish face. Ask your stylist for a cut that works with your hair's natural tendency and one that complements the shape of your face. 

A good stylist will also consider if your style is complementary to your body's size and shape. For example, a petite woman peering out from a huge bush of long hair is not balanced with her proportions.

In the photo above, I have just returned from my stylist.

I don't use anything but a gentle sulfate-free shampoo three times a week for styling products. I sometimes rinse my hair in the shower and then reshape it for the day, but skip the products entirely on most days. 

My thinning hair and dry scalp do not respond well to most products. A build-up of styling products adds weight, making my hair flat. It also gets trimmed about every five or six weeks. I don't allow my hair to get too long or get it cut too short. Both extremes add years to my face.

Warm water and a gentle skin cleanser remove makeup in the evening. I splash some warm water on my face to rinse it and then pat dry. I find that eye creams add puffiness and nighttime moisturizers cause me to break out, so I skip those. One of my all-time favorite moisturizers for my whole body is Coconut Oil.

My makeup routine has also been streamlined. In winter, I use a heavier moisturizer, but in summer, I use only a tinted moisturizer or very light foundation appropriate for my skin's texture. I apply the foundation mostly in my T-zone. (The T-Zone is the center of your face from your forehead down to your chin, where most of us were a bit oily when our hormones were plentiful.) 

Use a small makeup sponge or brush to blend gently away from your nose and skip the area around your mouth to not emphasize lines. This technique of starting your makeup in the center of your face and blending away helps avoid the dreaded demarcation line where your makeup stops and your neck begins.

Here is a blog post, including a makeup video.

I use makeup brushes rather than sponge applicators. They allow for better blending and less tugging on the skin. I use a liquid eyeliner applied into and under my upper eyelashes (on the waterline). I don't apply liner or mascara to my lower lashes because this looks very harsh on me. My eyeshadow is always the same in varying degrees of depth of color for the day versus evening. The palate includes soft beige, a very pale shell pink, gray, and grays that complement my cool skin tone. I start with the darkest color in my lash line and just above it. In the crease of my eye and just above it, I blend a medium gray. I blend the lighter colors up to my brow and then blend. 

I add a smoky gray color at the outside corner of my eye for more definition and drama. I use a taupe or gray eyebrow pencil to fill in my thin brows, but I'm careful to blend and brush that out as well. I use brown/black mascara, and that's it for eyes.

I brush on a bit of blush in a rose-tone high on the cheekbones, the bridge of my nose, and under my chin. If your skin is very dry, cream blush might be best for you. Once again, blend, blend, blend! Note: Do not smile and put blush on the apple of your cheek as we were taught when we were younger. When you stop smiling, the blush will be lower than you want and not have the effect you want at all.

I apply a lip liner over my whole lip and then a very similar color of lipstick. After blotting, I'm finished with my daytime makeup routine. During the evening, I may wear brighter lip color, but I apply and blot it several times while applying my makeup to stains my lips rather than sliding around on top. I will use a similar color lip balm to touch up during the evening.

I almost always wear sunglasses when I'm outdoors, and if I am in the sun for more than a few minutes, I also wear a hat and sunscreen. Skin cancer is no fun, and I hope to never have it again.

Confidence looks good on you!

Celebrating our fiftieth birthday often means a rounder body is a gift we receive. Hormones and lifestyle play a part in this new body shape, but we still want to look nice and dress in a flattering and comfortable way. I've been chubby for most of my life, so these tips are ones that I have always used to conceal a tummy that will never be flat no matter how much weight I lose.

1. Wear a top and pants or skirt in a similar color. Always wear a scarf, an open jacket, a blouse, or a sweater in a different color to add a vertical line. The top should never be tucked in. If it stops just below your tummy, that's an excellent thing. Look for pieces that have smooth finishes that flow across your body rather than clinging to it. Avoid anything quilted or bulky. Pants and skirts should fall from the widest part of your body. If your thighs are that point, pants should skim your body to that point and then flow smoothly from there. Skirts should end at the slimmest part of your leg, which is normally just below the knee. Pants should stop at the bottom of your heel. If you wear Capri pants, always wear a platform wedge shoe to add visual length to your legs.

2. Look for silky smooth scarves. The idea is to add a nice long vertical line, not bulk. Don't tie the scarf around your neck so that it ends with even tails in front. Avoid horizontal lines across your body. If the scarf is long enough, try looping it over itself to create a V below your bust. A V shape neckline is usually more flattering than a round one.

3. A thicker, low heel rather than a totally flat shoe will be more flattering. Carry a bag that isn't too small or puffy. A sleek and structured bag looks much neater and doesn't add width to your silhouette. Be cautious with shoulder bags that hang by your hips, giving you more width where you least want it.

Hold your head up high and smile. Confidence is your best accessory!

Long Sweater Vest

When the evenings start to turn cooler, I find that a long sweater vest is an extra layer that works for me. This one is from Chico's. It's a soft tone of blue-red that isn't too bright. I've paired it with a crossover tee in black and tailored gray slacks. When I want to try something trendy like these fun wedge boots in black, I look for a cute inexpensive option. I found these at Target. 

We were on our way out to dinner, so I switched to a small black and gold leather clutch bag. I'm wearing a red bangle with gold medallion details and gold with silver hoops.

Layers are Great!

Fall is in the air, which brings out the sweaters and jackets. This can be a great look for all figure types if you use layers to your advantage.

If you have long, lean legs, you can wear leggings or straight-leg jeans with almost any boot type. Just remember to balance the slender bottom half with a layered longer top half. 

Create a long slender line with one color in different tones. Add color around your face with a scarf and a long cozy sweater.

If you have a few extra pounds around the middle (don't we all?!), remember to keep those first layers smooth and sleek. The sweater may have to come off as the day gets warmer, so I normally wear a large scarf as well. Later in the day, it will be the outer layer I drape across my shoulders when I have to take off the sweater for the afternoon.

Petite Layers

If you are petite (5' 2" and under), a cropped cardigan or jacket and tailored pants will likely work better for you. Wear a smaller silky scarf and carry a more tailored messenger bag. The best jacket or sweater for you will end at your hip bone or just below your natural waist and close in a V shape. Steer clear of double-breasted closures.

An Evening Out

Mickey and I are on our way to an evening fundraiser. My jacket is a very lightweight wrap style with a collar, and I'm wearing a black tank under it. The lined black crêpe skirt is a bit shorter in the front and has a ruffle. The black satin sandals are by Sam & Libby. 

Over the years, I have collected pieces that are appropriate for evening wear. I mix and match them to create looks for the numerous evening events we attend. When I'm shopping, I always look for pieces that will work well with this mix. I can never find anything if I go shopping at the time of the event, so I've learned it's good to be prepared for anything with separates that can be paired together. (Actually, this philosophy extends to my daytime wardrobe as well.) 

I normally wear only one piece of major "bling" for the evening. Here I've added a dinner ring with a big pink stone mounted in antique silver. I always wear earrings because my ears are pierced, but they are very understated diamond wide half hoops. Resist the temptation to wear every shiny thing you own for the evening. That makes you look much older and too cluttered. The tiny evening bag is woven black satin with a simple silver ball closure. Always switch to a small bag for the evening.

Thanks for all your sweet birthday wishes yesterday. I had a wonderful day!

Frumpy No More

This is me in 1998, forty-two years old, five feet six inches tall, and weighing two hundred pounds. Those pants are a size 18.

My life was crumbling, and sadness oozed from every pore. I hated my job but was too deep in debt to start over in another. My then-husband was having an affair with a much younger and more fun woman. I was grieving for the children and family I would never have. In short, my life was a big mess! I cried every single day... sometimes all day long. 

When I hit rock bottom, I decided to change everything that I had the power to change. I started to eat more vegetables and fewer heavy late-in-the-day meals. I started walking. At first, I had difficulty walking to the end of the block. Soon, I was walking for a couple of miles every day. The weight started to come off, and I began formulating a plan to survive this difficult time. 

After the marriage ended, I moved to the New Orleans area. Of course, that was not the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, but it was an immensely better life than the one I left behind in Virginia. I made new friends and joined two gyms. My walks turned into five-mile runs, and my time in the gym filled the massive void in my life. 

This photo was taken at the peak of my bodybuilding obsession. I'm forty-five in this photo, weighing one hundred and thirty-five pounds. I'm still an empty shell of a human, but at least I look better!

In 2003, I left New Orleans and returned to my hometown in the mountains of east Tennessee. Some bumpy roads were still ahead, but I was home with my family and owned a successful business.

I'm telling you my life story for a reason. I hope you will read this and say if she can do it, I can! 

Change it if you are unhappy with some part of your life or body. Take little steps every day. Soon, you will be running (if not literally, then figuratively). Think of food as the fuel it is. Don't let it be your comfort and your entertainment. If you want to be healthy and thinner, you must make wiser choices about the foods and quantities you eat daily. The other twenty-two hours a day are worth making a few changes in your food choices.

The photo above is a more recent photo taken just before my fifty-sixth birthday at one hundred and

forty-two pounds. Those pants are a size 4!

My life truly began at fifty. I've never been happier or more healthy than I am right now. Not that being thin is the answer to all life's problems, but when you can sleep well at night without being in pain or struggling to breathe, you can make better choices during your waking hours. Sometimes, things are better than they seem after a good night's sleep.

I hope my story touches the lives of people going through something similar. I share fashion tips and my personal tragedies and triumphs, hoping to inspire you to improve your life. 

September Date Night

Cool Fall weather hasn't yet arrived here in east Tennessee, so I took one last advantage of the warm evening to wear a breezy summer look for Wednesday date night with Mickey.

 

I would not normally wear heels with Capri-length pants, but in this case, the long white tunic from Chico's paired with the khaki and white pants from Coldwater Creek almost gives the illusion of a dress. I wear a platform wedge shoe with Capri length pants in most cases.

 

The suede booties are by Nine West. I found them at Ross for only $24! You know I had to wear them right away.

The khaki and white straw bow trimmed clutch was purchased at T.J. Maxx this year.  I often wear silver or white gold jewelry because it is more flattering to my gray hair. The link bracelet and ring were purchases from my travels and are old. I'm sorry I can't remember the designers.

The necklace is from Belk by Erica Lyons. Small crystal and silver hoops are also from Belk.


Next week is my birthday week! Look for numerous new posts. Mickey has lots of events planned to celebrate.

Last Days of Summer

Summer is starting to fade away, but the afternoon is still hot. Yesterday was consumed with preparing for a big family get-to-together for Labor Day. My cool and comfy daytime outfit includes khaki ankle pants and platform cork sandals, both by Adrienne Vittadini from T.J. Maxx.  

I'm wearing a white gauze Old Navy tunic over a Coldwater Creek cream tank top worn tucked in only in the front. The over-sized silver and crystal watch, sunglasses, and hoop earrings are from Stein-Mart, and the gold and silver link bracelets are classics I've owned for many years. The bag is from T.J. Maxx a couple of years ago.

As Mickey and I walked through the grocery store last night, we passed a woman with her twenty-something daughter who looked me over and said, "Love your shoes!" That made my day!

Wednesday Date Night

Mickey and I have a fun tradition of getting dressed for dinner and having a mid-week date night. When he picks me up for our date we leave our stressful first part of the week behind us and relax with a light meal and a glass of wine. 

We visit with old friends or make some new ones and unwind for a couple of hours. This breaks up the week and relieves some of the stress of running our businesses and maintaining our homes. It also gives me the chance to wear shoes I might not otherwise wear!

 

The black and cream sheer blouse has an uneven hem that dips to a curve in the back. The cream tank has tiny straps that are adjustable. The cream linen type pants are the Natural Fit.

 

The secret to a happy relationship is to be with the one that makes you giggle!

Earrings by me. Most of the components can be found on the website VintageJewelrySupplies.com.

Always switch to a small bag for the evening. You really only need lip gloss, tissues, business cards, cash, and or a charge card. No need to lug your life around when you are only going to dinner. Evening bag by Kenneth Cole Reaction. I layered two fun "diamond" rings for drama.

A pedicure is a great time to relax and make sure you have healthy happy feet. For me, those toes are an important summer accessory. The OPI nail polish is the color Dutch Tulips.

 
Shoes by Impo.

Thanks for reading! I hope you have a great rest of the week.

Celebrating Stylish Friends

We are a group of friends who love to get together with Rose, the wonderful friend we all have in common. She and her sweet husband, Jerry, recently invited all of us along with our significant others over for brunch. 

I'm so glad my dear Mickey took this picture of us standing on the steps. (When you live on a hillside at the lake, you have lots and lots of steps.) This picture speaks to me on many levels. We are all vibrant, healthy, attractive normal women from all walks and many stages of life. This is a true picture of women. 

One of the best things about this stage of our lives is that we now have some time to get comfortable with who we are, with friends sharing laughter and our stories. Whether you are my Facebook friend or one who lives down the street, I'm so grateful to have you in my life.

 

 

This blog and my Facebook page (Fifty, not Frumpy) are dedicated to women who might be over fifty but are still having fun with fashion and enjoying life. Here's to you, beautiful ladies! May the second half of your life be even more fulfilling and exciting than the first.

Thanks for reading!

Easy Breezy Summer Afternoons

I'm wearing khaki ankle pants with a soft floral blouse from Coldwater Creek and Nine West shoes. The sunglasses and bangle bracelets are in brown tones and bone with brass accents.

I'm comfortable and casual for lounging by Mickey's pool in the pavilion with friends.

Yesterday we went for a drive to the mountains of North Carolina. When we arrived in Blowing Rock, it was much cooler than it was here in Johnson City. I visited one of my favorite boutiques, The Fig Leaf Ltd, where I bought this Damee swing jacket. 

It is a soft taupe/silver color with a bit of sparkle to it. The classic styling means I will be wearing it for years to come. I love the collar details, the three quarter length sleeves, and three large buttons. I'm also wearing black Travelers pants from Chico's and a black tee underneath the jacket. 

My earrings are large silver hoops with tiny Swarovski crystal details within the hoops.  The platform pony-skin sandals are by Vince Camuto. 

When wearing a dramatic style jacket such as this, I always keep all my other accessories minimal. It is enough of a statement on its own. One must be careful not to over-accessorize because that can make you look dated. 
 

Thanks for reading! I hope you have a great week.

Balancing Act

Do you have an inverted triangle body type? These pictures show two versions of the wrap top. They always make me look a little slimmer when the heat requires that I not wear a jacket or sweater as a third element. I have an inverted triangle figure, which means my top is larger than my bottom half. To balance this, I often wear darker colors on top and lighter colors on the bottom. I also avoid bulky materials of any type in tops and breast pockets on shirts or ruffles on blouses.

  
When wearing long pants, a maxi dress, or a long skirt, I often wear low flat shoes. When I wear a shorter skirt or cropped pants, I always wear at least a low heel. I prefer wedges or thicker heels since my calves are short and thick compared to my thighs. If I wore thin stiletto heels, the contrast would make my calves and ankles look even larger. 

Tank Tops to the Rescue

An essential element in many of my looks includes simple tops as a first layer.

Tank tops come in all shapes and types of fabrics. Knit ones with a bit of spandex are great for the smooth line they allow. If the tank top is made from a soft tee shirt knit, the next layer will almost always drag across it rather than flow smoothly, so they are better worn with heavier fabrics like denim.

 

 

Tank #1 has tiny straps adjusted to allow you to move the neckline lower or higher. This is a great tank to serve as a modesty layer only for cleavage control and a foundation to give you a smooth back under jackets and cardigans. 

Tank #2 has wider straps and ruching detail at the neckline for a bit of softness. It can be used as a relief layer when your top layer becomes too warm. It covers enough to still be attractive when worn alone while your "private summer" passes.

Tank #3 is a lace number that should be made from silk or rayon, or nylon so that it is soft and smooth under dressy jackets and knit cardigans with ornate buttons (think Chanel style knits.) This one has a warm glow of cream white, which looks soft and feminine in candlelight.

Tank #4 is a soft tee shirt material worn under denim shirts or sporty knit jackets.

Tank #5 hugs your shape and gives you a smoother body under thin jackets and sweaters.

Tank #6 is my necessary cream color tank when white is just too bright, as in the photo below. (I now make sure I pack my cream tank when I take this sweater for a weekend get-away.)

 

I'm wearing a thin knit cardigan with fringe detail and a silky smooth tank (which should have been cream colored) underneath.

 

This is an Austin Reed navy blazer that has a low V-front closure. I always wear it with a white tank and either a scarf or a necklace when we go out to dinner.

 

Here's another outfit, including a silky white tank and the navy Austin Reed blazer.

The black and white jacket needs just a bit of modesty at the neckline, so I'm wearing tank #1 here.

 

There is a white silky tank #5 under the thin gray bomber style jacket.

Tank #4 is under a quilted knit casual jacket worn with dark wash denim and comfy luggage tan booties for a recent trip to the mountains.

Thank you for reading! I hope these tips help you expand your wardrobe and have fun creating different layered outfits with the essential white tank top.